I have an extremely addictive personality. I get easily hooked on the most random things, including things I should not do. I'm a known cigarette smoker, I am a very habitual person, including some slight OCD issues... haha. As some of you know. Buuuut... in the right circumstance, this is a good thing for me. I have the ability to create good habits and never lose them. My problem is creating the good habit in the first place. Well, although with a little help (a little LOT of help) from my Grammy, I am hours away from receiving the keys to my very first apartment, all by my lonesome. Obtained on my own. And I couldn't. be. any. friggin'. HAPPIER.
This whole "achieving-things-on-my-own" bit is kinda' nice! What a rewarding feeling... sure, I've been on my own for 8 years now, but I've always had someone there as support- be it a roommate, boyfriend, or staying with family. This is the first time I've ever been completely on my own, and it feels AH-mazing! Now, I did receive some financial "aid" if you will, but it's only because my crappity crap credit score is low, requiring a double-deposit on this "dream apartment" of mine. Had I NOT had such bad credit, I could've easily paid the deposit on my own. Good enough for me!
This feeling of joy... of accomplishment... of pure and undeniable hope and excitement for the future is truly... addicting. Please, sir- I want some more! Yes, please. I have a long list of things I've been wanting to accomplish, and the fire is lit, yet again! Except this time, my head is at last clear of all nonsense. "Lay to rest the wastes of time..." My mind is mine once again, and it's time to get down to fuckin' business. Darn it!
A whole new chapter, fo' shizzle. Nizzle. This is my time to shine... and I don't mean some freak in a poorly-acted movie. Sorry Twizzle. I feel great and I just can't hide my smile these days! It really is a new beginning for me... at last.
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